August 2004

AUGUST
2004
Hi all. It seems the summer just started and now it is at its end. I start back to school in a few days and the weather is already fall like. We have had a bit of down time, or rather, I have, as far as traveling goes. Joe toured Italy and France this month yet our adventures still continue. Here’s the latestJ

EGG PAYMENT
During the summer almost every town has a festival. It is much like a county fair. We have been to a few of these and they are fun but after a few towns you start to see the same vendors over and over. Our tiny town of Lohnsfeld just had its festival. Joe was out of town and I didn’t feel like going alone. After the festival a group of about 25 teenagers were parading through the village or so I thought. They were actually collecting money to pay for the festival. I thought this was backwards and perhaps they should collect money prior to the event but that’s just me. Anyway, I did understand what they said when they came to the door and asked for money, but I played dumb and said, “Ich bin Americanishe. Ich spreche nicht deutsch.” Translation, “I am American. I don’t speak German.” Lucky for them, they spoke English. So a boy steps up and explains to me that they are collecting money. Another girl adds, “or eggs.” Eggs???? I said I didn’t go to the festival so I would not pay for it. This didn’t go over too well. I don’t know what the custom is but I wasn’t going to give money or eggs for something I didn’t attend. Next time, I think I’ll keep a few extra eggs on hand, just in case.

A SEA OF GREEN
I guess it was inevitable, but I recently had my first dealing with the death of a parent in Iraq. One of our 4th grade students is the child of a single mother. The father was never part of her life. Her mother had duel citizenship. She is German/American. She was called to duty in Iraq and was forced to leave her daughter with some distant and older relatives. As you may have guessed by now, that woman was killed in the line of duty. I went to the memorial service at the Army base. I was one of maybe 20 civilians and definitely stood out among the sea of green uniforms. It was a lovely ceremony and included another soldier who was only 21 years old. This single mother was 35. I sat amongst these soldiers and thought about how different their lives are from mine and even Joe’s. You see the commercials and read about how these people are fighting for our freedom but somehow, sitting in that chapel I had a new appreciation for what they do. I do not necessarily support the war but I will never begrudge those people.
The daughter is one of those kids that stands out in every way. She is stunning to look at, has good grades, fantastic manners….a teacher’s dream student, etc. I wonder what will happen to her. She has no American family anymore and the German side of her family do not speak English. She has a rough road ahead of her and I will keep her in my thoughts for a very long time. Perhaps you can too.


MURDEROUS MUSICIANS
As I mentioned above, Joe had a 9 day tour to Italy. This is one of his favorite tours due to the excellent food, hospitality of the Italians, shopping and more. But this tour was different. They were playing an outdoor concert and there were some protestors with the usual signs and posters protesting the war and the US involvement. However, these calm but enthusiastic protestors were even against having an American band in their country. Although they are musicians, they still wear the uniform representing the US and some people just don’t like it. They said many things, some vulgar, but the one statement that seemed the most ridiculous was Murderous Musicians. I mean, I have heard them play and they aren’t that bad!

TOURING
I thought you might be interested in what a typical tour looks like for the band. Sometimes I feel envious of Joe and all the places he gets to see. But he says there’s a price. I have a hard time with this “price” but perhaps he does have a point. Here’s a recent itinerary from his France tour.

Day 1- arrive Limoges, France
Dinner provided
Day 2- arrive Le Grand Theatre
Dinner provided
Day 3- Arrive Le Grand Theatre
Dinner provided

Day 4- arrive Reims
Dinner on your own
Day 5- arrive St. Avold
Dinner provided

Ok, so I left off a few things. I will try again. Just to let you know, the sponsor provided dinners are not optional.

Day 1- arrive Limoges, France (after 12 hour bus ride)
Dinner provided-9:30pm (seared steak, bloody inside, still mooing)
Day 2- arrive Le Grand Theatre (a 12 hour day including rehearsals with a French brass quartet and a two hour concert)
Dinner provided – 10:30pm (overcooked snails)
Day 3- Arrive Le Grand Theatre (another 12 hour day including rehearsals with French guest artists and a two hour concert)
Dinner provided – 11:45pm (unsure of exact source of meat, lots of cream sauce)
Day 4- arrive Reims (after 7 hour bus ride)
Dinner on your own ( Indian……bad choice….)
Day 5- arrive St. Avold (another 12 hour day that includes hotel check out, set up stage, sound check, concert, and 2 hour bus ride to home)
Dinner at rest stop

So maybe you’ll have some sympathy for the band and their travels. It’s not all fun and bus rides can get uncomfortable. France is a nice place. But put this schedule and the meals in Bulgaria and you have another story.



THE WEATHER CHANNEL…STARRING ZOE THE SPRINGER SPANIEL
If you’ve read a few of my newsletters, you may have picked up on the fact that we have a dog, a special dog, a dog that keeps me company, a dog that keeps me fit by demanding longs walks, a dog that is very popular with the kids in our village, a dog that tells the weather. Yes, it is true. She now has a secret signal that tells me it’s going to rain. Let me explain.
Just a few days ago, Zoe was feeling sick. It is a fact that when an animal eats grass it is trying to clean out its insides and does this by making itself sick. Zoe has done this before and while it’s not a big deal, it isn’t the most pleasant thing to watch. This last time when she got sick, Heinz, my neighbor saw her. He came over and said something to me that I thought surely I had misunderstood. So I did the usual and nodded my head and said, “ya, ya” (yes, yes). Immediately after that I was talking to my landlord and told her what I thought he had said. Now, Heinz recently had a stroke and his speech is sometimes slurred which is an added challenge for me. But this time, I understood correctly. There is an old German saying that when a dog eats grass then it will rain. My landlord informed me that I understood perfectly. Approximately one hour later we had a downpour of rain! I never cease to be surprised by my little Zoe.

FOR MASTER SERGEANT JOEY
As many of you know, Joe made Master Sergeant (E7) and I was invited to the ceremony where he formally pinned on his new stripes. I have never been invited to on of these ceremonies and was asked if I’d like to say or do something for him. I didn’t know what the protocol was but usually when something important happens in my life, I write about it. I’m becoming more confident with sharing what I write and did so at his ceremony. Some of what I wrote imply inside stories or jokes and those of you that know Joe well, will understand. I hope you enjoy my tribute to him.


I am the eternal optimist. Joe is a pessimist however be considers himself a realist. His latest mantra has been, “No good deed goes unpunished.” But in his case, I would say he has got a lot in common with a Captain Edward Murphy. Murphy was an engineer working on an Air Force Project designed to see how much sudden deceleration a person can stand in a crash. After a technician made a mistake, he said, “If there is any way to do it wrong, he’ll find it.” Thus Murphy’s Law was born. Simplified, if anything can go wrong, it will. Although I tend to be the optimist, I am convinced that Joe is related to Captain Murphy.

For example, when the band at McGuire AFB closed, everyone had to make 3 choices of where they’d like to go. Most people got their first or second choice. A few only got their third choice. Joe got none of the above. Murphy’s Law.

Joe auditioned for the Academy Band in Colorado and made it. This was a career goal for him in the Air Force. I resigned from my job and he went out house hunting. Our life was about to take a major change and we saw stability in our future. I sent out resumes and we prepared for our new life. A few months later, the person he was to replace decided not to leave the band and our orders were cancelled. Murphy’s Law.

Another example is the 10 years he was on the volunteer list to go to Alaska. We never got orders. Then after buying a house, I had a fantastic job, he was leading the jazz band and basically was at the pinnacle of his career, we decided to take our names off the volunteer list. Shortly after that, we were number one on the non-volunteer list and got orders to Alaska. We chose to turn them down. Murphy’s Law.

After testing for Technical Sergeant and waiting for the call and not receiving it, he couldn’t believe it. The next day, his commander sheepishly called him and said that his name had been cut off at the bottom of the paper and that he indeed had made the rank. Murphy’s Law!

You all know that it took longer for Joe to put on these stripes than any of us expected, including him. I kept trying to look at the glass as half full and encouraged him to do the same. He did however for him the glass was twice as large as it needed to be.

With a bit of research, I found some adaptations of Murphy’s Law that seemed to fit Joe.

Everything takes longer than you think.
If there is a possibility of several things going wrong, the one that will cause the most damage will be the one to go wrong.
If there is a worse time for something to go wrong, it will happen then.
It is impossible to make anything foolproof because fools are so ingenious.
Every solution breeds new problems.
Complex problems have simple, easy -to understand wrong answers.
If everything seems to be going well, you have obviously overlooked something.


I’m sure many of you have a story about Joe that could fit with Murphy’s Law. We can laugh at those stories now. You all know the saying that patience is a virtue. This is not an optimistic saying but a realistic one. But being the ever eternal optimist that I am, I say, “All good things come to those who wait.”


OPEN YOUR EYES
Open Your Eyes is a book I recently read that really hit home with me. It is a compilation of the stories of several children’s authors, many of whom lived in a foreign country. Lately, I’ve been feeling down, missing the good ole USA and at the same time feeling guilty for having these feelings because I live and travel in Europe. I’ve been to Mallorca and Bavaria just this summer! It’s hard to feel sorry for someone like me, huh? So, I don’t complain and don’t always understand my own feelings. Then I read this book. I originally selected it because it was written by authors of children’s books and that is what I want to be when I grow up. But when I started empathizing whole heartedly I realized why this book meant so much to me. Several of these writers grew up or spent a few years living with foreigners and shared their experiences. I have so much in common with these people. Perhaps my experiences over here will make a difference for me as a writer. Prior to reading this book, I wrote down some thoughts to ease my mind. Here they are:

THINGS I MISS AND THINGS I WISH
· I miss Americans and English speakers and I wish I could understand everything people are saying, even when they are not speaking to me.
· I miss getting a quick bite to eat and food to go but I wish America had more outdoor cafes that did not rush your eating experience.
· I miss good manners (by American standards) and I wish I understood the purpose of the Euro-shove.
· I miss convenience shopping but I wish America had more markets and closed stores on Sunday.
· I miss blending in with the crowd and I wish I didn’t stand out in a crowd. I wish Americans tried to be more aware of foreign cultures in America.
· I miss American holidays and BBQs and I wish we could spend more time with family and friends.
· I miss matinee movies and I wish they came out in English at the same time they do in the states.
· I miss privacy in my home and I wish all Americans watched out for their neighbors the way our German neighbors do for us.
· I miss big bookstores with coffee shops and I wish the big bookstore with the coffee shop in Kaiserslautern had more than two rows of books written in English.
· I miss Gina, my hairdresser and I wish I could get my hair cut, my eye brows waxed and my toenails painted all in the same place and day. (ok, I like a bit of pampering every once in a while)
· I miss listening to the radio and I wish my car radio was set for German codes so I could receive American radio.
· I miss receiving mail at my house. I wish I didn’t have to go to the base post office during certain hours to get my mail.
· I miss the good old USA and I wish Europe was in the USA!